There are a lot of people who fail with simply things like taking care of themselves. It's hard to walk away from someone who you care a lot about, and that is why so many people have an enabler feeding their addictions and their negative habits. You need to learn to let go of all the destruction and try to think of ways that you can make yourself happy. The first way for you to learn from your mistakes is to never repeat. If you are serious about change then you need to make sure that you'll take this as a learning lesson and avoid relapse.
The first thing that you'll need to do is accept the fact that you can't take of yourself and use other people to help you and guide you to get back on your feet. Your friends and close family are just waiting for you to come to them and ask them to help you. You'll want to consider that there are many people who really do care about you. You'll need to just take a step back. The next time that you feel the need to use or to drink, take a step back. You need to understand why it is that you do the drugs and drink the alcohol. You may want to consider the fact that it's childhood reasons. You may also find that it is stress. You may also think that it's just you in general. You'll want to consider talking to a therapist.
Once you have taken the step back and you have left the scene that triggers your usage. You'll want to consider that there are a few ways for you to increase your health, but it's not always as easy as you think. Quitting a lifestyle that you've had all your life is extremely hard. You can't just walk away from something that has defined your life. This is the time where you need to check yourself into a rehab center and try to work through the detox to get help. You'll also want to begin regular therapy sessions between you and all of your loved ones. This way you will be able to feel the support of friends and family that love you. The support will help you to look forward to life, and also you'll be able to see a difference in the way that you see like.
Instead of hurting yourself, you are also hurting your loved ones. Admitting that you have a problem is the first step, but it's not the last step. Of course, you have heard about the twelve-step problem, but honestly, you just need to take it easy. If you feel for a second that relapse is possible, then you will need to keep in mind that there are plenty of people who got your back, you just need to lean on them sometimes. There is so much that you can do for yourself, but you have to want to change. Wanting to change is one of the most important ways that you can overcome some of the demons. You'll need to keep in mind that there are going to be times of weakness, however, if you have people to rely on then you'll able to keep up all the hard work and stay clean.